Do friends, co-workers or loved ones ever try to sabotage your efforts to stick to a healthy eating regimen?
It doesn’t take a 007-type secret agent to derail a diet. People who like and even love us can undermine our efforts to stay away from sugary foods, baked goods and deep-fried offerings in favor of healthier options.
“Has anyone ever said to you, ‘Don’t you love me? You always eat my food!’ or “Won’t you try just one brownie? I made your favorite ones.’ If any of these sound familiar, things you’ve been hearing from friends, family or co-workers, then you may have diet saboteurs in your life,” says Lise Gloede, a registered dietitian based in Arlington, Virginia. “Just when you feel you’re on a good path to healthy eating, someone else gets nervous or feels threatened by your progress or success. This easily happens in close relationships, especially if one person knows he or she needs to lose weight but is not at the point of making that happen. When people feel threatened, they tend to fight back, sometimes in subtle ways. Emotions can get nasty and sabotages, whether conscious or unconscious, can occur.”
[See; 8 Weird Ways Obesity Makes You Sick.]
Dietary obstruction, intentional or not, can pose an additional challenge to the tens of millions of Americans trying to lose weight for health reasons, Gloede says. More than one-third of U.S. adults are obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. That’s particularly bad news because obesity is associated with diabetes, heart disease, stroke, osteoarthritis, asthma, high blood pressure and colorectal, kidney, breast and prostate cancer.
Fortunately, you don’t have to be a secret agent to foil a diet saboteur and stay on your eating plan. Communicating your need to follow your healthy eating regimen directly, calmly and honestly is generally a good approach, says Jennifer Pells, clinical director at Structure House, a weight-loss clinic in Durham, North Carolina. Here are some common types of diet saboteurs, plus strategies for foiling their attempts to disrupt your diet:
1. Happy Hour Howie always wants to get drinks and munchies after work. Not some of the time, all the time. He pressures colleagues to go and tries to make you feel like you’re letting him down, aren’t a team player and are anti-social if you don’t join him. Keep in mind this is Howie’s move, and before he offers the invitation, casually mention you have plans for after work, Gloede says. Join his group every once in a while and suggest alternative gathering spots with healthier choices, such as places you can get tea or coffee.
2. Lunch Lady Linda reliably invites you out to lunch, even if you’ve brought your own midday meal. She wants someone to keep her company when she goes to a local lunch place, which typically serves pizzas and burgers in big, unhealthy portions. Linda will try to coax you into joining her by saying she needs to talk to you. You can tell Linda you’ve brought your lunch, which you don’t want to go to waste, and offer to meet her in a cafeteria or at an outdoor table so you can eat and talk. Another strategy is to agree to go to lunch, but firmly pick a place that has healthy options, like salads.
3. Baker Bob constantly brings home-baked cookies, brownies, cakes and banana bread into the office to share with co-workers. He’s proud of his baking skills, and rather than setting his treats on a table for anyone to take, he delivers one to each person’s desk — and seems personally insulted if you politely decline. Be prepared by keeping a healthy snack, such as a piece of fresh fruit, at your desk, which will make it easier to turn down the treat. Or, take one cookie or a small portion of cake or bread and later give it to another co-worker or throw it away. You might tell Bob confidentially that you’re trying to eat a healthier diet and suggest he keep some of his treats in the company refrigerator so other colleagues can indulge when they want to.
[See: 6 Ways Obesity Can Weigh on the Brain.]
4. Competitive Carol isn’t thrilled that you’re sticking to your healthy eating regimen because she’d like to do the same but doesn’t have the confidence to stay with it, Gloede says. She undermines your efforts by saying things like “You know, 95 percent of people who lose weight gain it back” and by offering sugary snacks like chocolate. Realize Carol’s envious and politely decline her snack offers and try to get her on your side by asking for her support in your effort to eat a healthier diet.
5. The Sabotaging Spouse (or boyfriend or girlfriend) feels insecure that you’re losing weight while he or she isn’t and worries that many other people will find the healthier you attractive, Gloede says. This person will insist on having cheesecake or some other dessert after dinner at home or in a restaurant or suggest going out for beers, and when you demur, will accuse you of not being fun anymore. Reassure your partner that you still want to be with him or her, but also let them know that eating healthier and losing weight is important to you and you’re serious about making these changes. Instead of going to a bar or having dessert, suggest other activities, like going for a walk together.
6. The Birthday Bully gives you grief for not eating cake at his or her party and tries to make you feel like a disappointment. “Don’t get into a verbal fight, just laugh and move on,” says Jenna Bell, a registered dietitian based in St. Petersburg, Florida. “If the birthday person keeps pushing, gently tell them you’re trying very hard to limit your intake of sweets, and because this can be a struggle, you’d appreciate their support.” Another option is to have a small slice, and only take a bite or two.
7. Must Eat More Mom tells you you’re too skinny no matter what you weigh and tries to feed you more comfort food like fried chicken, roast beef, potatoes or dessert whenever you visit her. She feels the need to love you, and to her, food is love. You don’t want to hurt her, because she’s your mom and you know she means well. Be straightforward and tell her you’re trying to reach your health goals, let her know you think she’s a great cook and suggest she prepare healthy alternatives like roasted vegetables, Gloede says. Suggest that instead of seconds, you take additional food home in a container. “You can even set limits, like leaving her home earlier than usual,” she says.
[See: 15 Best Weight-Loss Diets at a Glance.]
Whatever kind of diet saboteur you may encounter, “stay focused on yourself and your goals,” Bell says. “This is about you.”
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How to Foil Diet Saboteurs originally appeared on usnews.com
