When news broke about Angelina Jolie filing for divorce from Brad Pitt, many were shocked to see the end of the Hollywood megawatt couple that is Brangelina (gulp, check that — past tense, was).
And as various headlines try to point to the cause of the split, as a career expert, I can’t help but think about how even when things seem ideal from the outside, what’s really going on can be quite different. For example, in your job.
[See: 10 Reasons to Quit Your Job Already.]
There are countless reasons to split from your current employer — we’re not here to judge, and neither should the people you surround yourself with. Here are some scenarios where it’s perfectly acceptable to put yourself first and “divorce” your employer.
You work for a toxic boss. Raise your hand if you’ve ever worked for a toxic boss. Now, raise your hand if you’ve ever left that job. If you raised your hand on the first question, you should definitely be raising your hand on the second one.
Whether your boss was that way when you first started working for them or they somehow morphed into an antagonistic bully over time — the point of the matter is this: Your boss should have your back. They should be in your corner. If you work for a boss who’s downright horrid, despite other people telling you to stay, you know deep down that the best answer for you is to leave.
You’ve been passed over for a promotion. That’s right, you clearly possess the skill set, experience and just like that, a promotion came and went — that is, to someone else on the team. Even worse, your boss opened a job requisition in order to hire someone from the outside for the very same skill set you demonstrate!
Sit down with your boss first and have a simple conversation stating that you thought you were qualified. Engage them in a dialogue — is there a reason why you were passed over, a specific skill perhaps you’re lacking? What can you do to develop your skills in that particular area so that the next time you won’t be passed over? And even if you get those answers, it’s still perfectly OK to start pounding the pavement. You can always land that promotion somewhere else!
[See: Famous CEOs and Executives Share Their Best Career Advice.]
The commute’s wearing you down. This one’s real and extremely exhausting. A reader recently mentioned their two-and-a-half-hour daily commute, even six months into a new job, was cumbersome. That alone is reason enough to give your two weeks’ notice.
Note: You may want to think outside the cubicle on this one — perhaps you can work from home two to three days a week to make your commute more bearable. Overall though, if there’s no flexibility, give yourself permission to move on!
Your skills are getting stale. Find yourself playing Candy Crush during one too many conference calls? Hello to boredomville. When you feel stale and your brain cells are on autopilot, it’s perfectly all right to separate from your employer. Sometimes it comes down to simply needing a change to get excited about your field again — even making a lateral move within the industry to experience another company’s inner workings and make new contacts.
Your annual increase has been barely there. One of the most effective ways to boost your pay is finding a new job. The national average pay increase this year is expected to be 2.9 percent, according to Mercer, a consulting firm headquartered in New York. That bears repeating — just 2.9 percent! So, if your increase is minimal, unfortunately that’s likely the norm. As for the good news? Rest assured, you can do something about it by realizing your starting salary somewhere else will probably be higher.
The employer lost their luster. Perhaps you previously drank the Kool-Aid or the company changed its values altogether. Whatever the case, when your ideals, values and ethics no longer align with those of your organization, it becomes increasingly challenging to work on their behalf.
In a new survey by the London-based professional services firm Ernst & Young of nearly 10,000 workers across age groups, less than half said they “have a great deal of trust” in their employer! That is reason to pause and find the nearest exit door — to a company with leaders and managers you can trust.
[See: Tips for Surviving a Career Transition.]
You need a change of scenery. And sometimes you don’t need a major reason at all, it’s simply time to move on — you realize other employers have more robust salaries, benefits packages and perks, oh my!
So, once you’ve decided it’s time to separate from your current employer, there are several strategies to do it amicably and with great tact. If we’ve learned anything from Brangelina (and almost every other celebrity split), things can get ugly fast. So talk to your boss, select your resignation date (and stick to it) and keep the conversation as well as exit interviews light and polite. Offer to help train current colleagues, write handwritten thank-you notes and ask your boss to be your reference — if you did all of the above, hopefully their answer will be yes!
There’s a well-known adage that says, “You never get the second chance to make a first impression.” Well, last impressions matter, too — always leave on a high note. Smile on the way out — not sarcastically, not smugly — simply grateful for the experiences and skills you’ve gained so you can now leverage them in your next career move — and all the ones that come after it.
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When it’s OK to Split From Your Current Employer originally appeared on usnews.com
